Having been around the fetish scene a very long time, there are a number of scenarios that come up regularly.
“I want to be a 24/7 owned slave”. Think carefully what you mean by this. If your Mistress tells you to spend the day chained to the kitchen sink and then the house catches fire, are you going to stay and be burned to death..no, of course not (I hope) .So, even in a very structured relationship, there are going to be times when you have to make a decision.
“I want you to use and abuse me” Sometimes, yes! However, it is not very interesting for Mistress to spend a session telling you that you are a pathetic wimp (even if you are!) .How about an interesting conversation along with a bit of abuse? My subs ARE allowed to have opinions, and voice them…that is not to say I will take any notice of them.
“Hit me HARD…I have very high thresholds! ” Now, a tap to one person is hard to another. I used to session with a lovely older man in his eighties. He believed I caned him hard, because, to him, a tap WAS hard. So, be prepared initially to give me a safeword. When I begin to learn your limits, it should be unnecessary but intially I will not session without this in place. Many who have been in the scene a while may have weak spots. I do not draw blood, so if I see the skin is going to break and I cannot avoid that spot, I will not continue with a caning.
“Topping from the bottom” is a rather silly phrase in my view that has been around a while. In my opinion, an initial chat is necessary to make sure we are both on the same page. If you simply want to “brat” to get attention so I punish you, that is not a punishment! We will work together to begin with to establish our own set of rules. If we cannot do that, I am not the right Mistress for you.